Tags
boxers, Brian Miller, briefs or commando oh my, did it make you blush?, how personal do you get?, PubTalk
His stomach hurts. Skin cold and slick with sweat. Can’t sleep. Mind racing.
‘Dad, I’m nervous.’
‘It’s ok. You’ll have fun. You need rest, get some sleep.’
Tossing//turning, he finally gives up& this morning was in the shower before I got up.
Today, my son started his first job. Only ten, it’s volunteer. He’s working at the elementary school during summer enrichment, with a boy the teachers have been unable to reach. An encourager. A friend to help them stay on task.
We walked him in and watched, silent, as they explained to him what he would do& he gave the nod it was time for us to go—we’ll pick him up this afternoon & i’ll let you know how it goes
He’ll be fine& learn things about himself& others that i could never teach him—
How much of yourself do you share in your poetry? How personal do you let it be? Where do you draw the line on things you would not share? Why?
Let’s talk about this.
I am saving my opinion for the comment section this time, as I want to hear from you& not guide the conversation to start. Look forward to your insights& opinions.
& see you right back here tomorrow @ 3 pm, for OpenLinkNight. Get those poems ready. Smiles.
~Brian
dVerse 
very cool on the work your son is doing…. i hope he has a wonderful first day… have to run some errands and will be back with my thoughts in a bit..
yeah, he had a blast…he is doing math class which is not his fav but he does well with it…the boy he is working with is 2 grades below him as well…tomorrow he will probably make me just stay in the car and drop him…ha.
It’s good to be back after a little break to welcome in this world my newest nephew. That’s awesome your son has the chance to do that, Brian… will be back later to comment, although I do want to point out that whether something’s real or not can sometimes be left up to the reader…
yay welcome back laurie…i hope that it all continues to smooth out there as well…
very true, it does not have to be real to impact the reader….
Lovely to see you again Laurie ~
…real or unreal the end result will be justified by the poem itself & be defined by its reader… smiles… welcome back Laurie…
Congratulations on the new addition!
Close family follows my blog, so if the truth is something I’d rather not share than I disguise it as so other, I can say someone/thing else inspired it and not even own up to the self-revelation. If it’s a safe topic, then an all-out vivisection may be possible. And as for your son, I hope he has a fantastic day; as a mother to a son, who needs a buddy at any and all functions, the child (and his family especially) will appreciate your son’s efforts more than he will ever know. Thanks for sharing that with us.
smiles. i know the feeling on family reading…my wife reads daily…but my mom and brother lurk…ha…only every once in a while do i hear from them online…usually it when i am in trouble…smiles…interesting on masking the truth in fiction…i have done that…
I think there are advantages of your spouse or family reading your blog/s ~ They can be a great support system & feedback ~ I think its cool and sweet to see your wife responding to your posts Brian ~
one thing that is very good is accountability…smiles…and i mean that in a positive way…its supportive but also it keeps me honest…smiles.
My husband never reads, but knowing that it goes into his email every time anyway helps to provide just enough restraint. 🙂
ha. true that…
smiles… some colleagues from at work read my blog and my daughters do every once and a while… they love when they discover themselves in my poems… just recently my daughter in australia read through quite some of my poems and she loved that it was another way to stay connected to what’s going on at home…
If my mother wrote poetry, I would be eating it up in an effort to get to know her better. That’s fantastic that she has access to you in that way, especially when the distance is great.
that is actually really cool…one of my hopes is that one day my boys will read and know me a little better…that is way cool…
Brian, I hope that perhaps you do a book from your poetry for your sons. It is nice to think they will someday search the blogosphere for your poetry, but it might (after a while) be hard for them to do, with all that you write. My personal goal is to do a hard copy poetry compilation every year. I am working on another one now…1 1/2 years worth (time got away from me). I do it a lot for legacy…for children, grandchildren….and someday. Have you thought about doing this kind of thing?
That’s a great idea, Mary.
That is a lovely idea Mary! Nothing remains like a hard bound copy though I succumb to the soft versions
Hi Brian, that is wonderful about your son. Congrats to him. On writing, I usually find myself in what I write, though admittedly there are depths I want to explore more. But, that is a touchy subject in many aspects for me.
Pamela
smiles…a touchy subject indeed…
i would agree, that even in my fiction you will find me…for a season i was writing psuedo horror short stories…and even in that there were elements…
have enjoyed your prose series…though i promise i wont psycho-analyze it to find you…smiles.
Thanks on both counts there, Brian.
..wow, at ten he is learning to be his own man now… i’ve always been a shy type when i was li’l… then when got into my junior high i became a volunteer catechist teaching everything about God to children on streets, remote areas, public schools, anywhere… by the time i stepped in to college i shifted to another challenge & became a Red Cross volunteer helping my brothers & sisters in time of calamities, donating bloods when possible & many more… ah, what more rewarding experience in molding one’s character & views in life… smiles…
..basically, i hate explaining my works… not because i am too lazy to do that or i don’t have the perfect english to do so but simply because i birthed my words with enough dose of trust & faith that it can raise itself alone without me doing it for ’em… i let my poems sell itself to the reader & not me sell each of ’em to anyone… i believe in that way i don’t have to lose the quality of a poem… my job as a writer is to be an instrument in translating & putting into words the unwritten stories, the secret message of the air… of the sky & the clouds… of the trees & rivers… of everything that surrounds us… the rest of the tasks will be & shall be left between the readers & the poem they’re reading…
..in my poetry i don’t think i ever wrote a single poem in fiction… yes, i do most of the time used fictional characters, elements, words in my poems but i believed the sole message is always based or associated to some kind of reality or truth… some may not be autobiographical yet in some ways or another will ring true for others… smiles…
..good morning…
the unwritten stories…secret messages of the air…that is cool stuff man….and then the leaving to the reader as well…i would def say all mine have an element of truth…
i would say that close to 85% of what i write is autobiographical…in some way…or someone i meet…i get a lot of my stories just talking to people…
i wonder is there a line you would not cross in it being auto-bio?
good morning sir…
eloquently said, Kelvin. Although I occasionally use fictional names, my poetry is full of my expanding and contracting perceptions of what is happening both around me and inside of my own psyche. I learn a lot about myself as I write. Great topic, Brian.
great point on learning about yourself as you write…i def do the same…some not as good to learn as others you know…smiles
yes, some truths not nearly as rewarding as others. So happy for your son, Brian. It says a lot about his character that he is being honored with this job. He has clearly received good mentoring himself. ~jane
ya, not sure how that happened…smiles….
i am very proud of him…he is reading the guardians of ga’houle right now and bought him the next book this morning and wrote him an inscription in the front letting him know how proud i am of him…
: )
yes, i learn a lot about myself as i write as well… sometimes there’s just a little spark that gets me writing and i’m surprised about the direction the poem goes sometimes… and some of my poems… well i still have to figure out what they really mean…smiles
I have some old poems that are still a bit obscure to me. I have to read them and analyze them. There is one that I do not remember what triggered me to write it. Anyway, in general I write what I believe, my view of the world, what I feel. The inspiration and the subject are not always my own experience first hand, sometimes inspiration comes from a movie, a dream. Sometimes it all start with a set of words that trigger the idea of a poem and I just have to write it, to discover the poem while the words keep coming to me.
the way you describe it made me think of excavating…the discovering the poem while the words keep coming to you…ha…there are a few that i have to wonder at my motivations as well…smiles.
Stephen King refers to it as ‘digging up a fossil’ in his book “On Writing”. He talks about stories, but it also applies to poetry –I think…
…i am all about learning, understanding, experimenting, discovering — these are my recipes to inspire the uninspired… to reach the unreachable… to make happen the impossible… smiles…
Jane, I feel the same. I learn about myself as I write. I like the way you expressed what your poetry is full of. I like that kind of poetry, as when I read it I feel I really learn something about the poet!
I agree, Kelvin, that poetry has to be about truth–poetry must contain it, reveal it, discover it, dance around it, something–but truth is always present and the best poems, to me anyway, are ones with the most universal truths.
…yes, the best kind of all… i don’t think i ever read a poem that doesn’t express even a single truth in it… smiles…
Love your tags as usual Brian ~ Will frame my thoughts carefully so I will be back ~
A great experience for your son to be doing this ~ I commend you and your family for encouraging his spirit ~
thanks grace, look forward to what you have to say…
ha and glad you always notice the tags…smiles.
Ha, I had to go back and read the tags. Hilarious, Brian.
ok, so how personal would i get…not sure where i have drawn the line before…i have talked about marital issues, i am free in engaging politics, sex & religeon which is often labeled the big 3 sins online…
one line i always adherred to was confidentiality for the kids i work with…and i rarely use a story about them that is not 6 months old at least and i am out of the picture…and i never give a real name of them or my students…
if i knoew the story would intentionally hurt someone i cared about i would either ask or not run it, most likely…
when i first started i had much more taboo’s and as i shed them i found much more freedom in writing…
(add more later…smiles)
…it’s really hard to gain focus on only one issue & / or theme & i applaud those who could do so.. as for me, i chose to write randomly… basically because there are just many things around that are too interesting to ignore… you mentioned about the so called 3 sins… i think of the 3 i can be better up for politics as it’s just too easy to hit a point from something almost by nature dirty… religion is quite off for me as i am.more into elemental worship than sacramental… maybe if there’s one i am totally not into or very much in favor to be read or used in a poem it would def be the usage of dirty words like the ‘f***’ word… i am not offended by this type of word/s but i just don’t get the essence why some do really patronize the using of such… for me it doesn’t not pay respect to the art of poetry… a big disappoinment… hmmm…
…not in favor… let me correct that… & doesn’t… disregard the double entry of not at the end..
interesting points kelvin… for me it’s not so much about using specific off-words or off-topics i think but about respect in general – if someone writes with respect and in a wise way, they can tackle the most difficult and delicate topic and i’m still ok with it
…i understand… i just wonder if that’s the only word/s available to use to express a poet’s intention/s… like, can’t it be done in a more well schooled manner? …i’m puzzled…
hmmm…i think there is a place for swearing…and i know it is a turn off for some, so you have to know that going in….when i first started i never used it…i have since…its one of the things i had to get over…and found freedom on the back side…
i think of susan daniels puzzle poem…it popped, to me…i still remember it…i may never look at a triple word score the same…ha…
so i think it can be done…
Kelvin, I’m guessing are you familiar with Lenny Bruce and George Carlin? Both were mid-to-late 20th century comedians who found fame and later notoriety for ‘pioneering’ the use of heretofore “dirty words” in a public forum. Carlin can be found on numerous youtube videos, and had trenchant and biting social and political commentary. I’d argue that comedians, as spoken-word performers, are cousins to poets – jongleurs and jokers of old. Now those words are nearly everywhere – shock value still evident, but jaded audiences no longer respond. But their impact in this part of the blogosphere – relatively sheltered, but for the spoken word poetry in hip/hop and rap music – remains strong – and also jarring. But ultimately, less effective, because as exclamatory utterances, they carry little nuance, and therefore tend to detract (in my view) from a piece. Then, you read Dover Beach / Dover Bitch and now what?
maybe respect is the keyword for me.. i write quite openly and most of the stuff i write is quite personal as well…even if disguised a bit with surreality sometimes..smiles.. but i try to be respectful.. no matter if it’s politics (though i don’t write much about politics) or relationships, colleagues at work or family… respect i think is the key for me and that’s where i draw the line…
respect is probably a good point…i dont always follow that, particularly with politics and maybe to my detrement…i rant at times and tell it like it is…i dont know that i always do it respectfully…hmmm
Claudia, I agree 100% about respect. If I come upon a poem that I think is disrespectful of political beliefs or religious beliefs or something else, I will just be on my way…..and say nothing. I am not one to choose to get involved in someone else’s controversy.
Exactly, Claudia. Well-put.
This subject is very close to my heart… For starters, I want to say that I write as close to the heart as I can get, and it seems the more I allow myself to write what wants to be written (without arguing, as I say in my blurb), the closer I get to what feels real. I’m not averse to sharing anything about myself really; when I hold back it’s more for other people’s sensibilities than my own (I have family and friends who read my blog). But, finding ways to express, and sensitively, that which isn’t supposed to be named, never mind talked about – well, the challenge of that’s what keeps me playing in this sandbox.
i like how the challenge of expressing those unmentionables empowers you a bit…in the sandbox…smiles….and i think you are onto something there with not getting int he way of the heart with what needs to be said…i can tell when people hold back sometimes…and i want to cheer them on off that cliff…ha…
Congratulations on your son’s first job. I’m sure the benefits will go both ways.
I have difficulty in going deep and/or dark in my poetry, partly because my family reads my blog, but also because of inbuilt inhibitions. That said, when I do manage to dig deeply into my personal history and feelings, the poetry is usually a little better for it.
i had a lot of those inhibitions to get over several years ago…probably partly from my parents as well…one thing i did was i started an anonymous blog where i threw everything out the window and went as dark as i could…very few know that playground…and i dont write there any more, but…i eventually found the freedom to express some of it, maybe a little more refined in my place…
Your rules of confidentiality make sense, Brian, and I share them not only for students but everyone I know excepting my parents–but for them I have been withholding things I hate or have hated because they read the poetry I post. So right now the intimate picture of me is cheerier than it could be. Odd thing though–the more I find the love beneath old wounds, the more I love and the bad things fade! Odd thing. I have forgiven them for poverty and its issues, like I never thought I would. Have I spoken about or merely hinted at sex and lovers and marriage and divorce. I feel exposed, but I have to admit I am highly shielded from all but a very few. Several of the latest poems I posted have me or a friend in them, intimately, but I am not sure you can find us.
i have def felt exposed at times in my writing…probably the most was a few years ago a piece i did on the struggles in marriage…i just kinda laid it out there…its one i struggled to publish…i like when i struggle to publish something because for me that is a measure of truth…when i become uncomfortable with myself…
Susan, I like that part of finding love beneath old wounds & forgiving ~ Perhaps writing heals us, in some form or another ~
Brian I like that your work is also the source of your writing ~ You make it very real, not withstanding the lack of names and details ~ The story or situation can be compelling and meaningful enough without all the real life details ~
If I post something really gut-level, sometimes I don’t know how it will be received. I have taken some risks. I have found the blogosphere very supportive, but sometimes admittedly after I push ‘publish’ I have qualms.
Don’t we always have qualms after hitting “publish” ~ I still do ~
some daya i do…some days i dont…and some days i wonder if i am striking the cord when i dont feel it…like it left something out….
Is there a line I won’t cross? I’m not sure, yet, still peeling back the onion one layer at a time. I have qualms every time I publish. I also worry every time I write or direct for the stage that I don’t really know what I’m doing. I’ve come to accept that pain as part of creating. As if I have to reinvent the art each time, examine the musicality of my expression. Sigh. I sure feel alive!
I also think it’s very cool the work your son is doing, must have inherited some mentor qualities from his dad !! I sense a bit of a challenge in your post, is it time to pull out the fancy underwear? maybe that old tie-dyed thong and get a bit cheeky in tomorrows poem ??!! Maybe that’s why I like the beat poets so much, I like their no-holds-barred let-it-all-hang-out get crazy wild and see where the chips may fall kickassitude !! I think tomorrow I’ll draw a line and long jump over it and see what happens !!!! Besides even though my mom may read my blog once in awhile, I’ve never let that stop me before and I’m too old to start worrying now !!
i love the beats as well…and that may be why as well…i love rebels…smiles.
ok, triple dog dare you to jump the line tomorrow….ha…
i have a bit of a crazy one for tomorrow, but dont know if i am line jumping…might have to do that myself…
First, I love your son’s job. I wish all jobs were equally rewarding.
In a way, I am fortunate that my family doesn’t follow my writing although at times I wish they would. It is complicated but best to know that I feel more freedom without revealing my work to family members.
I don’t believe that I leave a bit of myself in everything I write or that I have to experience something in order to write about it. My imagination is far more vivid than reality. I see my moral stance and belief system come through strongly but I personally have never found a secret window to the world of elves or balanced on the tip of a cloud.
Some poems appear on third person to shield the identity of the inspiration, whether that be myself or someone I know or someone I dreamed up.
All is fair in the third person world, right?
My family don’t read my writings too except the ones that I send to them, which is rare ~ I find that this scrutiny makes it easy for me to write anything and everything that I like ~
i know the feel of wishing certain ones would read as poetry is a place i find easier to express emotion at time…smiles..on the imagination being more vivid a playing field than reality as well…that is where i go with my short story work…
i will get back to you on 3rd person…let me think before i talk…smiles…cause i have def done it…
do you think its as easy to connect with 3rd as much as 1st?
Perhaps. It’s a well-traveled convention; think of the pre-literate story-keepers: all stories were of the past, of her and him. It makes the voice universal, and therefore secretly personal, as each listener / reader can think, that is me.
I, too, like to write myself into a third person she or he–and sometimes I mix reality with what Aristotle calls “more true”–an imitation of life elsewhere applied here and now.
As to your question Brian, I share myself when its about my everyday life, work and family in this EA blog ~ I won’t mentioned names either to protect the source of my inspiration or writing ~ I don’t talk about sensitive topics either, religion and politics included but I will share my opinion in general, positive or negative ~ My family is aware of my blog but they don’t read and react to my posts, its like my personal space and they respect that ~ Lately I am experimenting with different writing styles and I like the freedom of doing that in my own way ~
As to my other blog, I tend to take on a mask, and let the words flow from me, usually in a more sensual way ~ Not all of it is based on my (plain) life, but on my imagination or someone else’s experiences ~ I like the duality, like playing different parts for a while ~ It balances my work which is rather technical & dull, smiles ~
Grace, interesting about your other blog. It is cool, I think, that you have this duality and that you use your imagination and write from there. And I can imagine that it would be a balance / contrast to your work. Plus it must be fun to have that persona and write from it.
i wonder do you intentionally write for one or the other…or do you wait and see where to post it after you write it? how does that work for you?
(Am coming back online after a power outage)
Brian, it depends on the prompt & my muse ~ Generally, I first decide which persona should speak – my everyday me, or the other me ~ My everyday me is easy to write, I feel no angst or anxiety during my writing or after my post ~
My other me, when I am writing, is another story ~ Sometimes it takes me the whole day to polish and polish my words, its like I am finding her again within me ~ I think I told you before that I sometimes forget about Heaven’s persona, so when I read back my words, I am like, I said that ???~ It amuses me when people say I seem to write so easily, what they don’t see is the struggle I have to write each verse ~ But my muse is lovely and I honor what she has to say after all these years ~
smiles…i am glad you see the beauty in her…and that crafting def shows in your work….interesting on finding her again…i get that…
I truly wondered about the erotic persona, Grace! Thanks for speaking to it. It seems that there the imagination could truly soar.
Yes, I find it fun Mary ~ Sometimes, I don’t where “she” comes from, ha ~
How wonderful is your son to volunteer at such a young age. Good kid and great family values! Kudos to you. As for your big question, I’m probably too open. Partly due to therapeutic writing for so long, partly wanting the world to know of the evil world into which I was born but no one wants to hear about, and because it’s just the way it flows. I learned not to edit myself. If I do write something that crosses some line, please please tell me.
maggie, i dont know that i would say no one wants to hear about it…i talk about it as well due to the nature of my work…i find peoples stories compelling…even if it is coming out of darkness…i dont know that i would worry about crossing a line…this is more on challenging them and discussing them more than establishing them…smiles.
Well, I have commented on other people’s comments (which I found very interesting). As for me, I have a hard time writing something that is not personal to me. And actually, I really enjoy the personal in people’s poetry. I feel like, layer by layer, I get to know someone like Brian (who writes the personal) or Claudia (who writes the personal) and some of the rest. I don’t learn much about a poet who writes only in obscurity. I know we all change our styles, so I will say that sometimes I write in obscurity too….for variety….but much of the time I write my own story! But if a poet only writes in obscurity or from a distance I miss the personal. Some people may feel different, so I know it is different strokes for different folks. I share what feels comfortable to share. I DO sometimes write of a fictional situation, but (LOL) people generally assume the situation refers somehow to me….so sometimes I have to clarify in comments that this is NOT me. I do believe a poem should stand alone, be judged on its own merits, whether or not it is about the poet’s life. A fictional poem CAN convey real feeling and real meaning, for example. Sorry about the ramble.
ah that is why we do this…to ramble a bit…smiles….i def like to feel like i can connect with a poet…i like that personal touch because it grounds it for me…makes it relatable…though i can def relate to emotion as well…its a preference thing…
its like Cubans sunday question on art and the ARTIST…if i develop a relationship with the poet, i am more likely to appreciate a position that may be different than mine…
Mary, I like how you are sometimes changing your voice and style ~ I appreciate your meaningful posts, fictional or not ~
I started out writing from obscurity, Mary, and often want to hide in it. When I look at it from a reader’s standpoint, I like clarity, but admit I appreciate when something is left for me to make personal through reading. I think of someone like Neruda, pouring his heart out, or William Carlos Williams writing from nature as if nature herself is a person. Like you mention above, I too seem to have many voices, or maybe facets to my voice-which are still evolving (i hope) This discussion really has me thoughtful.
Well i often don’t like being really clear when i write…because 99% of what i write is about me or something i’ve experienced…as it is the only way to make my poetry…real (for me). And I realized that I often like to keep the true intentions behind my words hidden because of all the unknown eyes who could be reading what I write…Since it is so easy for everyone to judge someone through his writing…without ever truly knowing the reason behind it. I try to refrain on too much negativity too…as I get the feeling that people can’t often deal with that either
mm…i wonder have you found people that have judged you because of your writing? or is it more they just dont return…ha, also would like to hear how you define negativity?
Brian, for a lad of only 10 to be doing this – a support role like this is truly amazing. How proud you must be of him, also that others have confidence in his ability – waiting to hear the outcome.
I share everything in my poetry except perhaps for some ‘erotica’ – which my muse asks me to write now and then, however my daughters (though both adults) read my posts now and then and it is only out of sheer embarrasment – that prevents me from writing this genre. Failing that as they say ‘the world is my stage’ and I hold nothing back…perhaps at times I should.
we are proud of him…he is doing good work for sure…
ha on not sharing that with your daughters…so do you keep it in your notebook or do you post it on a different place? smiles. i dunno, i think the more we share the more people begin to understand us a bit more…oft for me it is as much the artist as the art….it allows me to see more…
unfortunately it remains in my head… maybe one day I shall be game.. yes putting it ‘all out there’ does allow the reader to be more intimate with the writer… thanks Brian for replying, kind of you.
i try…smiles.
in your head? ack. i have to write mine down…my head gets too full…ha
or i am afraid i will forget it. smiles.
forgetting is part & parcel at my age ugh..
Maybe this weekend …maybe..
I shall probably don the chicken suit however 🙂
ha.
no chicken suit, especially considering the subject of your writing.
ha.
i hope you at least write it down in a notebook or something, you never know when its time might come.
🙂 thank you Brian..I think I shall
My husband has a habit of telling people if they want to know his wife they should just read her poetry – it is the only place where I put it all out there. And I guess I do. I write from the heart – the words come from there. Overthinking just doesn’t give my words their wings, their soul. Not everything I write is about me, but it is about what I have felt in either full face or in passing, as part of life lived or observed. I love to dig deep and put things into words, and hopefully (prayerfully) get people to think, to be challenged, to feel encouraged and sometimes move them to action.
we have similar goals in our writing…most writing at least…moving people one way or another…well most, not sure what tomorrow’s is going to do but entertain…smiles…ha….
what an amazing thing your son is doing. it will surely help him grow tall – he is lucky to have the opportunity to do something so valuable so early in life.
in my poetry, i am often drawn to the ‘dark side’ (after all, their light sabers are way cooler). i often write in first or second person, which doesn’t necessarily mean i tell a tale about me. sometimes i just witness something that takes hold of me… that i can’t shake and have to ‘get out’… something i’ve seen, heard… sometimes something i experienced, too.
the great thing is, in poetry, the lines are blurred. there are no real restrictions when it comes to what i reveal – and what i don’t reveal. what i love most is that i don’t have to hide here… i’ll simply let the reader decide if i made stuff up – or if i told something personal. i often process ‘darker thoughts’ in my poems, a part of me i can’t really display ‘in person’, in daily life. i love creating images out of the ordinary. words are a safe place for me – for when i blog, i can be anyone… and no one, at the same time.
sometimes i’m in my poems. sometimes i’m not… but the words are all mine, and that’s all that matters to me. keeps my (as a fellow blogger says) ‘washing machine head’ sort of organized.
thank you for this, Brian. reflecting on what we do and why we do it certainly is a necessary thing to sort oneself out. i enjoyed ‘stopping for a minute’ to think… because usually, i flip a switch… writing mode… game on.
oo their light sabers are cooler…curved handles and spikes….smiles…
the feeling of not hiding is huge…and something i think becomes more comfortable the more you do it…when you realize it is safe to be you….and a place to explore those thoughts that you might not be able to IRL…
glad to get you to think…
playing a bit of catch up…our internet has been wonky tonight…coming and going so had to run out to the cafe real quick…
Miriam, I like this part: words are a safe place for me – for when i blog, i can be anyone… and no one, at the same time.
Brian, we just had a really bad storm and everything was down ~ Happy to be reading everyone’s comments again ~
ah, well hope that has passed for you…our phones and net were messed up so maybe they are working on something somewhere down the line…
How personal?…. there are some things I would really like to write about, but I fear that certain persons would read them and be hurt by them… so for now, I remain quiet. I reflect on certain feelings (motherhood is easy)… Nice nudge, though. I’ll have to give it some thought. Thanks.
i agree…i def dont want to hurt people…i can give a pretty good nudge at times…ha…but i try not to intentionally hurt others for sure…
I’m going to post an older one later today for dVerse that hints at “baggage” I carry but out of a sense of … I hate to say respect as I don’t really, don’t write about it. Yet. Thanks for hosting, Brian
Brian,
Good for your son! Maybe he takes after his dad in his ability to reach people!
Good question and food for thought. Some of my poetry is very autobiographical, while others are strictly imagination, and some, in between. I typically don’t explain the poems or comment about how they are or are not personal. Sometimes I find readers addressing me about a poem that really isn’t about me at all. That feels kinda strange, but it does make me think that I’ve expressed the emotion well. I think each writer has to decide for him or herself how much to expose. If I feel comfortable with the audience (like here or on other poetry blogs I belong to), I’m more likely to contribute something deeply personal.
ha. that feels strange. yes it does. but you are right it is probably a good measure of how you handled emotion…interesting thought too on considering the audience and their support empowering you to maybe take risks…
alright poets…time for bed…or to go read and get off this machine for a bit…
i will check back in the AM, thanks for another great discussion…
OLN tomorrow night, woot!
My writing is all over the place. Sometimes a line or a title can be inspired from real life; other times I write these in-depth character poems where nothing at all relates to me- method writing I suppose. I don’t know if my fam reads my writing or not, but I’m at times proud to a fault and occasionally I’ll force myself to write about something deeply personal just to spite the part of me that wants to be private. I need to knock myself out of my own comfort zone now and then. But like others said, ultimately, it’s all in the reader’s perception.
ha, just to spite the part of me that wants to be private…that gave me a chuckle but its probably a good expercise too…a little push back….
Brian, good on your son, your wife, and you.
I write pseudonymously partly from that chicken suit “mum” mentioned earlier (I’m in the finance sales field, where everyone is googled/linkedin/etc.), and partly because I view all language as fiction, so my persona can be as well. Bear with me: words mean things, of course, but the very act of speaking and writing means editing, censoring, or otherwise shaping an undifferentiated field of experience into discrete phonemes that somehow carry sociological value, and that represent a dictum of intention by the author, whether fictional or “factual”.
I suppose I view writing as “factional”: containing elements of perceived experience and crafted and molded to ill or well represent some emotional construct from writer to audience.
So is it “real”, or “true”? I dunno. I favor boxers. 🙂
~ M
ha. boxers. i am a none guy and have been since college. oh, tmi. smiles.
factional, i like the word. writing allows us to be who we want and that offers a bit of control…
i spent about 7 years in finance/sales, in a corporate enviro so i hear what you are saying…
M, years ago the nor was to use a pseudo for the reasons you mention. I agree too that as writers there is a level of fiction and the matter of craft. My work is that – art , craft. How much or how I exist in the work isn’t my aim. My aim is to connect with the reader. I’ve thought and discussed with many writers over the years about the persona we create in addition to the work we draft.
L – an scripted epiphany from college days was this: we craft (or can, perhaps) every moment of our day, from the blank clay of our existence. Of course it’s not truly blank; that’s like saying a cake isn’t in the shape of its pan. We all have ‘stuffs’ from which we have planted or been planted into from which we gather and form our day, or our art. But to the point of persona: we are son/daughter, worker, lover, client, patient, customer, consumer, artist, friend, critic. We are every book we pick up and put down.
Fascinating to read everyone’s responses! As for me, it must be clear to anyone who reads my stuff that I’m essentially a confessional poet, letting it all hang out.
I think there are two issues here: what do you write, and what do you post? In the writing, I am committed to being truthful – my truth, the truth of my feelings and observations; not necessarily the same thing as objective fact. When it comes to the possibility of hurting or embarrassing someone, I can choose to refrain from posting something to my blog, or even from submitting to a lit mag or anthology (though that would have less chance of being seen by the wrong eyes, so I might risk it). But I think the original writing must be authentic.
That being said, I do sometimes write fiction in verse too, which I guess can be confusing for readers. And I sometimes write of myself in the third person, as a literary experiment rather than a disguise. What I think I am doing is creating art – so it woud be ideal if the poems could be received as themselves, as works of art, without reference to the personal (except insofar as they strike chords in readers realting to their own experiences). That is probably impossible, though, in the blogosphere where we get to know the people along with their poetry – and it’s nice to get the personal comments too. I just have to accept the necessity of sometimes explaining: ‘That’s not about me’.
I don’t think there is any word or subject that is not fair game for poetry. But I do think they must be used for good reason – because the word is the absolutely right one in that context; or the subject is one which demands that you write of it.
People have different ideas on religion and politics. I write from my personal truth in those matters too. I don’t set out to offend anyone, but if anyone is offended simply because I express opinions different from theirs, well as far as I’m concerned that’s their problem.
Above all, I bow to the demands of the poem.
ha. it is their problem, i hear you there…i think that when i was talking about respect earlier that is more what happens with me, my opinions are just diffrent…smiles…i like your intention to good reason, and that is kinda what these talks are hopefully about—thinking about what and why we do things…you can do a lot if you are intentional about it…
I must say, people are generally vey nice in the way they receive any of my poems that deal with being Pagan. But then, I am perfectly able to appreciate the beauty and truth of the feelings in much Christian poetry, too.
Brian, I should also say that I love the way you write about your family. There is so much love and enjoyment, I don’t think there is much possibility of seriously embarrassing them.
Brian, I am up to my ass in alligators but this prompt is VERY intriguing. I let it all hang out, as a general rule, being Old and Having No Filter. Cackle………will see what I can come up with, tho am Horridly Busy so may well be late. Great prompt. Your son rocks. No surprise. So does his dad!
hope the alligators dont get you…smiles….
ah its less a prompt and more a conversation…though we should maybe fo there again…its been almost 18 months since we did the taboo prompt and asked people to throw themselves over the line…
What a nice opportunity for your son, to give part of his time to someone in need… yes the world need a lot more of that. I tend to leave myself out of the poetry most of the time. But I like to write about things that concerns me. The concept of evil and good, why we live as we do. Also my angst of things that might happen is common,
I would say that it’s about 70% fiction in what I write.
why we live as we do…now there is def something that i tumble around quite often…if you figure it out let me know…smiles….interesting in your approach, because you are a very good writer…and i like different opinions/approaches….smiles.
Nice Brian to know that you have let your son learn and explore things that cannot be taught but by experience. It is so easy to coat them as being ‘social service’, requires much more than a heart to do so!
Coming to writing poetry, interesting to read everyone’s thoughts here. well I have a thing of using the first person, often. I feel better in expressing when the person is ‘I’. Perhaps, a way of catharsis of what I would want to be / I am the way I am / I wish and well so on!
I have been away from this forum for sometime now;caught up. Hope to walk in through the OLN tonight. Yup it will be night for me when you throw open the door for some sunlit poetry!:)
i am big on first person as well…not saying it is right to always use it, but it is my preference as well….
and caught you poem this morning…good to have you back! smiles.
Another cool topic. Often I read comments to poems and the reader’s response is an assumption that the poem is autobiographical. Interestingly, I only see this with poetry and not fiction. And I guess because I majored in English, my approach to work is well in part, academic? I see poetry as I see literature and writing as general. As a writer, all my work is informed by my experiences and perspective, but I’m not necessarily journaling my life in a work.
I draw the line at sharing things that aren’t mine to share. I am willing to share personal details in my work but I respect others’ privacy. That’s where the lines blur and characters are crafted to express experiences that are not mine wholly to share.
Ack, off to the doctor. Back to read and contemplate more later.
hope all goes well at the doc…i agree…i def change the other people in mine while retaining the essense of the character…
This is like: “way cool” and Ido share a good bit! 😉
thank you ma’am…i would say you do…esp liked the way you are telling it in the haibun
Wow, what a son!!! Buttons popping off your shirt? They should be. You and your wife have done a wonderful job by adding a giving child to this mix we call life.
i think he’s pretty cool…smiles…thank you…smiles.
I applaud your son Brian, couldn’t we all use a “helper” like that now and again. As for what we share I generally try to be more universal in what I write. From comments on my blog I have found that the pronoun I use makes a huge difference in how readers perceive my writing though. (I.e. If I use “i” in the piece they assume it is about me/my life, vs. if I use “you” or “one/he/she” they do not necessarily think that. It’s an interesting topic. There is a lot to this topic, and a lot to think about. It also goes to our reasons write in the first place.
Your son sounds a lot like my daughter, who started vol’ing early on. Your are great parents to have inspired such a boy, and his choice of task is particularly telling, as your work has been around the same, Brian. That’s a nice, shiny apple that fell off your tree!
About what I share… for a long while, I spoke of sexual abuse/incest in the third person, always “she,” but eventually I realized I was shaming myself and also others who might not have the voice to speak out. So I took on claiming that.
The rest… hell, I’m an open book. Anyone who thinks they “have something” on me had better read my blog first. Oh, I don’t think I’ve written about biting my nails… so that’s about it. Mental health (or lack of same), being a slut in my 20s, all that jazz (literally), drug use in my 20s, one bad marriage and one good one, in the right order, and the power of God in my life without trying to be preachy, communing with the homeless or writing about them from observation… yeah, every day I write a new chapter in my own gospel… as one person said in the church band, :”The Gospel of AmyPants.”
I think that when we write there is inevitably something of us in each poem/story simply because it is only the person we are in the moment of writing that could have said exactly this in exactly this way. As for how open I am in my writing; some of my stuff is pretty obviously based on my experiences, my understanding of situations etc, whether it has been written in the first person or not. Some of it is clearly fictional; I’ve never taught either wolf cubs or budding rock stars for instance, neither have I beaten my lovely and oh-so-patient wife … smiles
How much of ourselves and our lives we share openly in our writing is pretty much a personal decision, and each of us will draw the line in a different place. When writing about other people, I usually try to anonymise them – but not always. If I don’t, and I think that the person concerned would be upset, then I don’t publish … simple as.
Kudos to your son on his voluntary job, too. You have every right to be really proud of him, and he of himself.
Interesting question. I find that I can share much of myself of 5 or 10 years ago in my poetry, but not so much what I am feeling and thinking today. I suspect it is a bit of a control issue. I know the outcome of yesterday, but today is still just a little too close for comfort. Peace, Linda
Hello Brian….this is quite a question..for.I tend to feel that I’m a bit too ready to put my feelings and personal situations into my poetry and that maybe I ought to be more objective and perhaps even technical. But my inspirations were always of that sort…you know…frost, yeats, louis macniece,the war poets and bob dylan. I’m sure that I ought often to review …review …review my work much more than I do also……some I do… but am I afraid that the reviewing will deaden the initial emotion?….maybe!!
oh and I’m with Tony on this one…your son sounds like a great kid!!!
Ah, sometimes my poems are very personal. However, when a poem touches my life directly, I avoid writing about things that may be hurtful to people I love.