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Hello Pretzels and Bullfighters… I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve seen you. Summer will soon be over, and I will return from my break. I couldn’t stand it, though, and just had to pop in to say hello.
Guess who I ran into? Mark Windham!
Here he is with his wife waiting to get started, but I insisted on a poem first.
Degrees of Desperation
We dream in degrees
of desperation,
each thinking the other
should be persuaded
by our own particular vision
of happiness.
I asked her once
if it was her heart or her head
which caused her to stay,
or some tribute
to the ideals of love
and commitment.
It seemed a period of years
before she answered.
I stay because of vows uttered
and moments remembered.
I stay because children should
not suffer from a rash decision.
I stay because I refuse to believe
a life is nothing more than things
nestled into a corner of the room.
I stay because I still cry when
your space at the table is empty
or your side of the bed is cold.
I stay because I long for the future
we planned, and I have never
longed for another to hold my hand.
I stay because I believe love that was
can be again, if we wish it to be.
We dream in degrees
of desperation.
Tell us about yourself, Mark.
I have lived in the southeastern US all my life, but in several locations: Mississippi (2 places), Kentucky (3), Texas, Virginia, North Carolina, Florida and Georgia. I have been in the Atlanta area since 1994. I have been married to my wife, Kathy, for seventeen years. We have two children; Jake (15) and Katherine (11). Both do well in school and run cross-country and track. I also have a daughter, Ashley (22) who lives in Florida and is attending college. (Also three dogs with no useful skills or occupation) Kathy and I own our own business, Windham Business Services, providing management accounting and consulting services. Which really takes time away from writing, but those kids insist on eating. Every day! The reason I write and how it started is on my blog. Some publication credits include a couple of dVerse projects (Nain Rouge contest and The dVerse Anthology), The Poetry Nook & The Dead Mule School of Southern Literature among others.
What would you like to see your poetry evolve into?
In what direction do you think you feel you would like to go?I don’t think I have a clear idea of what I would like my poetry to evolve into. My hope is just that it keeps evolving. I like trying new things: new forms, new structures, playing with punctuation, etc. Most of what I write is free verse, but I do enjoy the challenge of structure and form. Even if the form/structure is one that only I recognize.
How do you really feel about straight-forward constructive criticism, particularly if it is very pointed?
I love it! I even ask for it on my blog. Two of my favorite readers are Margo Roby and Viv Blake because they are not timid about pointing out mistakes and offering that constructive criticism. I have no illusions about how far I have to go as a writer and how much I have to learn. If someone is willing to take the time to offer constructive input as to how I can improve then I hope to be a sponge and take in as much as I possibly can. This might be my only complaint about the blogging environment: we all feel compelled to offer praise or say nothing at all and move on. I am ok with knowing why someone does not like a poem of mine, especially in matters of technique, style, structure, etc.
When writing a poem, how do you know you’re done? Do you ever get satisfied?
Short answer, no, keeping in mind there is a difference in an ending and being done. I frequently write with the end in mind. The rest of the poem is figuring out how to get there. Being done, though, is rare for me. Every time I go back and look at a poem I will find another word to change, a comma to move, line break to change…something. There reaches a point where I may be done with a poem, but I never feel the poem is done.
Do you have an audience in mind when you compose?
That depends on the inspiration for the piece. If it is in response to a prompt then it is obviously intended for the audience on the prompt site. The poems which are not prompt related generally are not audience driven. It is more a circumstance of having to write, I will figure out what to do with it later.
On average, how long does it take for you to write a poem?
I should probably be embarrassed to admit it, but a first draft (most of what I post is a first or early second draft) is usually finished in a sitting. Which may take five minutes up to a couple of hours. The revision process depends on the current motivation and time available.
Are you ever surprised at which pieces of work your readers respond to?
Constantly. There are times when I feel good about a poem and the response is in line with my hopes, other times, nothing. Or, the reader finds a completely different meaning. Other times a poem that I throw up with very little effort or expectation gets rave reviews. I have learned to embrace the different responses, but they are times surprising.
The Suicide Forrest
In the Aokigahara Forest of Japan,
in a place called the Sea of Trees,
people go to die,
not the diseased or elderly,
but those who view life
as an abstract,
a feasible idea
lacking in structure, purpose
or completion.
Bodies are found hanging
from the trees, their belongings
stored in tents below.
A dense forest,
where once Samurai
came to preserve their honor.
I’m so glad I ran into you, today, Mark… if you’ll stick around for a bit, I’m sure our readers have questions for you, too.
~~
Where to find Mark:
Web Pages: www.awakenedwords.wordpress.com & www.windhamservices.net
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkWindham67
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarkWindham67
LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/markwindham
dVerse 
Nice to learn a bit about you, Mark! I completely agree with you about constructive criticism…I wish I received more, but am reluctant to offer it to others.
You can always correct my English Bryan 🙂
Thanks Bryan, it can be a iffy proposition to offer critique of other’ work when they have not expressly asked for it.
Laurie, great to see you back doing an interview…
Mark, I always find your poetry worth reading, and when we cross paths the thought and the idea behind it capture me most… the suicide forest I had not read before and the way it’s written intrigues me.. but how do you get the ideas on what to write about..?
Thank you Bjorn. I still write to prompts pretty regularly. The other stuff, much like other poets I am sure, really finds me instead of me finding it. The Suicide Forest piece was a news article I came across. I have written to things I have come across on National Geographic and walks to the mailbox. I guess I do not spend much time looking for inspiration, but there are things I come across that must be written about.
Thanks, Bjorn. I’ve missed y’all.
Excellent interview, Mark and Laurie. I stand with you in many ways…loved your thoughts about critique. It’s so valuable. You have a lovely family. And the poems were amazing.
Thank you Victoria!
I enjoyed reading about Mark and reading his poetry. Thanks Laurie!
You’re welcome, Annell.
Lovely to learn more of Mark: thank you, Laurie.
Constructive criticism: thanks for the praise, Mark. I have learned to be very careful about who will welcome suggestions etc. Some resent the slightest correction of a typo!
I always appreciate when you point out my typos and grammatical errors.. and wouldn’t mind more Viv..
I always appreciate your comments, Viv, and am always thankful you are reading and will take time to point out my indiscretions. 😉
feel free to critique me too! I think that, as a writer, I am handicapping myself if I do not allow others to coach me a bit!
I try to walk that middle ground between critic/editor & poet when I respond to other’s poetics; reminding myself that too often when I criticize it is simply because it is not the way I would have written it. Nice to know more about you, Mark.
thanks, Glenn, and agreed, sometimes the only critique is just that I would have done it different. Which is also often a good lesson in perspective; it is different than i would have done, but still just fine.
Great to see you all! Laurie – awesome interview as always. Mark – loved learning more about you. Very cool. Howdy to all who are here commenting and visiting…miss you my pub going friends and poets!
Hi Shanyn, great to see you as well!
Thanks, Shanyns!
Well, look at you! How lovely to run into you here. Nice to see the photos of the children whose accomplishments I see on Facebook.
The second poem’s topic is one I have put by. I find it fascinating. I like what you have done with it.
Yes, they are real and not just an excuse. 🙂 That one has gone through many cuts/edits, I like it more than where it started, but it still does not feel quite right to me. I want to add more to it and keep resisting the urge.
LOL…
Reblogged this on Awakened Words and commented:
An interview with little ol’ me.
So glad I read this from deverse today. I love your work, a true poet for sure.
Thank you Lisa.
hey mark,
nice to meet the family. did not realize you are just down the way in atlanta…very cool…been there a couple times…we’ve lived a lot of the same places as well…VA, NC, FL…i like a good crit as well…its cool that you have found those comfortable enough to give it to you…
yeah, you are probably a little familiar with where I graduated HS; Jefferson Forest, Bedford County. 😉
ha. i teach at staunton river….
my boys will go to forest
thought I remembered that. We were just barely in Bedford Co, lived off of Hawkins Mill near Wiggington, but that was 30 years ago…
Great interview and poems, especially the Suicide Forrest.
I welcome constructive criticism, but I’ll probably never feel confident enough to offer any of my own. Call it a writer’s neurotic masochistic narcissism, but my inner voice constantly screams at me that my stuff sucks and that I shouldn’t post any of it. I imagine tha poor little guy would riot inside my head if I ever tried to be critical of other poets’ work.
Instead of a critique or generic praise, I try to let the writer know what emotions are tickled by my reading their work.
(Also, if I come across work that leaves me speechless, I go ahead and admit to the poet that I wish I had written it instead of them.)
Thank you Barry, I do know the feeling about offering a critique. The usual feeling is “who am I to offer them suggestions?”. Often it is better to develop a critiquing relationship outside of the public realm of the blogs. More comfortable and honest.
i agree with that completely…i think the public forum is a hard place to do crit…because it is too easy to ping the ego and esteem….
I’m always scared of squelching the poet’s voice.
Good know you better, Mark. I know what you mean about a poem never being done. Any time I go back to a poem I change things. Sometimes I change a bunch of things. And I never know if I’m making it better or worse! Great interview, I’ve always enjoyed your work.
Thanks Jeff!
You have a lovely family Mark. I like your poems. I’m torn about the criticism idea. I’d be flattered if someone took the time, but devastated if they were too critical. Guess it’s important that one respects the source. Enjoyed this interview.
Thank you Myrna.
Hi Mark,
enjoyed the interview and the poems. “Degrees of Desperation” particularly resonates with me. Love it when life and love aren’t glossed over. Makes them all the more beautiful and worthy.
“I stay because I believe love that was
can be again, if we wish it to be.”
I believe that.
So, just praise, no constructive criticism from me today.. I don’t do it anyway. (But I do have a hard time resisting pointing out a typo 🙂 )
You’ve got a beautiful family, Mark. God Bless. Hope you continue finding time to write – you have a very distinctive voice, always great to read your poetry.
Sasha
(a.k.a. The Happy Amateur)
Found it!! 🙂 Thank you for the kind words, and keep pointing out those typos!
How eerie to read the suicide poem today, the day that Robin Williams died. But the rest or this is a joy, Mark and Laurie. Welcome back.
I know… that is eerie. I’m devastated by the loss of Robin Williams.
Thank you Laurie for this wonderful interview…so nice to get to know a poet’s world Mark…the interesting inner process, circumstances and inspirations…the first poem is so touching…and what a lovely and sweet family you have ! 🙂
Thank you
Synchronicity, although suicide is common. I lost a friend in this way a few weeks ago and today, in her honour and for others like Robin Williams I wrote this:
Suicide
It is my life to make of what I will,
or can in any given moment, although
the darkness in that shrivelled creep
contains me, often, holding tight
with bony fingers of fear, clutching
at the edges of my sanity, playing
with the frayed fringes of mind,
teasing, taunting, calling me to be
other than what I am, drawing me on
and through, the valleys which
huddle beneath soaring mountains
of possibility that I fear to climb,
for I might fall, and drown in that
great ocean of sky which threatens
to engulf me in waves of imaginings,
as if I were a young eagle, feather-
fluffed on a first, timid, unexpected
flight, flung from rocky outcrops
of cold reality; avalanched into
eternity, crumbling down through
thundering dreams and nightmares,
careering in a pebbled dance of
probability; scattering at last in
silence, far below where I began,
leaving only shreds of myself and
broken pieces of my life, waiting
to be brought together in mosaic,
by all those I had left behind
and to whom I offered my ending
and my beginning to make of it
what they would, while I soar
high above on shining wings.
Thank you to Laurie for thinking of me for this interview, and always thank you to the team at dVerse for the work they put in to provide this forum.
what a cool interview laurie – and cool to meet your fam as well mark
the suicide forest poem hit me – dang – and the historical reference as well
when it comes to crit i think it needs trust but i def. find open words in the comments ok as well if said in a nice way
thanks Claudia, the crit is a touchy matter, so hard to tell who is open to it and how to approach it. And there is a big difference in criticizing and critiquing.
Mark, that first poem, especially, is remarkable….so wonderful, and wise, the words that preserve and nurture love and commitment. The Samurai poem is wonderful, and shows the scope of direction you have in finding topics. Your dogs are wise old souls. I so enjoyed this glimpse into your life. Thank you, Mark and Laurie!
Thank you!
A cool interview. thank you Mark and Laurie.
Mark, I enjoyed your description of the process- I too rarely feel “done” and edit nearly every time I go through my compendium. I haven’t been writing long, but much of what you described resonated with me. Poetry can be a lonesome affair, so it’s nice to get the support of similar methodology from an accomplished poet. Thanks for being here, and thank you, Laurie, for bringing him to us.
I think we all go through similar issues and thought processes, but the poet does like to think they are alone in the world. 😉
It’s nice to learn more about the person behind the name. When I first discovered your writing, Mark, I thought “Now there is a seasoned writer.” You articulate well. Your verses always have depth and meaning behind them (as is visible in the two poems shared above). You fast became a writer that I make a point to read whenever I see your name. I did not find it in the interview or comments, but I am curious as to how long you actually have been writing poetry? Thanks for sharing about yourself. And thank you Laurie for helping us get to know a fellow writer through your interview!
Thanks Ginny. To answer your question…not that long comparatively. I started writing in high school thanks to a great teacher, then I pretty much quit for a lot of years, then picked it up again in 2011ish.
Wonderful interview, Mark. Great photos included, as well. The suicide poem is stunning in its sparseness. I have always admired your work, and am happy I got to peek into your life and mind a bit.