Hello, this is Frank Hubeny with Meeting the Bar. The theme today is brevity. In particular it is to write a poem with no more than five lines. There are no other constraints.
What poems are so short? Limericks have five lines. One stanza of common meter has only four lines and could be considered a complete poem. There is also the cinquain. Tony Maude presented this five-line form at dVerse a few years ago. Tanka have five lines and haiku are even shorter with three lines. Any of these would fit today’s constraint.
To focus on tanka, Jane Kohut-Bartels provides a two part introduction to the art of writing tanka. In particular note her reference, in the second part, to how the third line acts as a pivot line. What that pivot provides is a content structure in addition to the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable structure. After finding that out I now look for a pivot in meaning in these very short poems.
Also consider the modified tanka form William N. Porter used in his 1909 translation of the Hyakunin-isshu, a collection of 100 tanka compiled in the 12th to 13th century Japan. His English tanka form has 8-6-8-6-6 syllables with a rhyme on the three shorter lines.
Kevin Steinbach reads Porter’s introduction and translation of the Hyakunin-isshu made available by LibriVox.
To participate in this prompt write a five-line or shorter poem in any form or free verse and post it to your blog. Copy the link to that post and place it in the Mister Linky below. The Mister Linky will show a list of others who are participating. See how other poets have met the challenge and comment on their writing. This is how we get to know each other. The Mister Linky will be available for two days.
Frank Hubeny said:
Welcome to brevity!
Björn Rudberg (brudberg) said:
Hello Frank… love all the freedom you are giving us… short poems can be the very best sometimes… Hope to see many… Could also think of Rubai as another short poem
Frank Hubeny said:
Thanks, Bjorn! There are many forms I forgot. The rubai is a good one to try. Even a two-line iambic pentameter couplet would be another.
kim881 said:
Hi Frank!, master of brevity! Hi Bjorn! Hello to all you dVerse poets! I’ll keep it brief…
Frank Hubeny said:
I liked those branches in your poem yielding to spring.
kim881 said:
Thank you, Frank!
kanzensakura said:
As is senryu – often mistaken for haiku but without the seasonal reference haiku has to have and Bokuseki – another Japanese form. Good topic Frank! I have linked up my haiku.
Frank Hubeny said:
This is the first time I’ve heard of Bokuseki. I’ll have to look it up.
kanzensakura said:
It basically is Japanese for “ink trace” or “footprints of Buddha” giving a dichotomy to the form. Images are to be painted boldly or reverently.
lillian said:
Hello everyone. Sad day here for my husband and I. Waiting for plane to take off for Michigan. Tomorrow we will attend funeral for a dear friend. I’ll log on tonight at hotel to read—but may not get to all posts til Sunday. We’ll get home Saturday night. Life is precious. Tell your loved one you love him/her today.
Frank Hubeny said:
I am sorry to hear of your loss. Best wishes to you and your husband.
whippetwisdom said:
Good evening everyone and thank you for hosting this lovely prompt Frank! I am a great fan of short poems and will swing by to read in a moment :o)
Frank Hubeny said:
Short can be very memorable. I liked your haiku and photographs.
whippetwisdom said:
So very true and thank you! :o)
paul scribbles said:
Nice prompt Frank. I’m exhausted. Hiked a long way today in freezing conditions ( longer than planned due to vehicle break down…old vans huh?) I will be sleeping soon, so will catch up on the rounds tomorrow. I have put up a poem.
Frank Hubeny said:
Thanks, Paul! I usually enjoy hiking but not when exhausted and cold.
erbiage said:
Thanks for the offering Frank. I wonder, how do you all think the syllable count affects the feeling of the poem? -Eric
Frank Hubeny said:
I’m usually affected by the meter of the poem and the sound. The number of syllables is only part of that, but one needs syllables. In Porter’s tanka form he modified the syllable count to try to make the tanka feel right to English readers in 1909. Interesting question. I wonder what others think.
Glenn Buttkus said:
Senryu & tanka for me–usually a tag on a Haibun. I do enjoy the short forms, but as verbosity screams for life, I also like to let the dogs out. My Cinemagenic form is so complex, I have never seen anyone else attempt it
Frank Hubeny said:
The thought of writing screenplays seems difficult, but then I haven’t tried hard to do it. The dialog is important–or so I imagine. Good point that verbosity “screams for life”.
memadtwo said:
Thanks for the information on form and variations. Although I didn’t deviate from my usual form, I have definitely made a note of it. (K)
Frank Hubeny said:
There are many possible forms to use. Anything short works. I liked your poem and the painting that went with it.
memadtwo said:
Thanks Frank.
Rosemary Nissen-Wade said:
Hello! I shall hope to write one later in the day.Meanwhile just wanted to let you know there is a name for what you said at the outset: a five-line poem without other constraints. In fact there are two names. There is the gogyohka, created by Enta Kusakabe. Well, there is one slight constraint: it must have one phrase per line. He became possessive about the form, so the lovely Taro Aizo then invented gogyoshi, five-line poems with no other constraint at all, and declared that everyone was free to write gogyoshi. (Which I often do.)
bilocalalia - talking about living in two places said:
I read about a free verse form called pentastich, which also has no rhyme and no syllable limits. https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/pentastich
Frank Hubeny said:
That would work as well for five line poems. Of course even poems with less than five lines would work for this prompt.
Rosemary Nissen-Wade said:
Thanks. It seems that gogyoshi and pentastitch mean the same thing. 🙂
bilocalalia - talking about living in two places said:
But gogyoshi sounds cooler.
Frank Hubeny said:
It does sound pretty good.
Frank Hubeny said:
That is the first time I’ve heard of gogyoshi, but I will explore it further. Thanks for the information!
bilocalalia - talking about living in two places said:
I have to confess that I combined yesterday’s prompt with the one for today.
Frank Hubeny said:
If it is short, it should still work for this prompt.
Charmed Chaos said:
Hello everyone- Love the prompt, as I write a lot of short poems. Thanks for hosting Frank!
Frank Hubeny said:
Short poems allow the reader and writer to focus more. I liked picking out keywords in each line of your poem and exploring the associations: wine, lips, kiss, bliss, door.
Charmed Chaos said:
That’s a great way to look at them. Thanks for sharing that Frank. 😊
Bekkie Sanchez said:
I love brevity! It’s not as easy as it looks to write short forms. I actually prefer them as most of my poetry is that way. I couldn’t make up my mind and wrote a couple of poems but only linked one today.
Looking forward to reading everyone’s takes. I was sick and didn’t make it around but feeling much better now. That’s 2 times I was sick this year and I’m hoping that is it. Lol!
Have a great rest of the week!
Frank Hubeny said:
I’m glad you’re feeling better, Bekkie. I like the illumination of the unseen in the dark forest in your poem.
Bekkie Sanchez said:
Thank you, Frank!
ladynyo said:
Hi Frank and everyone else here! I have a tanka today….but I am no longer sure of my forms….I’ve loosened up over the past few years on this form, but I have the rest of my life to learn it. But this is brief.
Frank Hubeny said:
Good tanka. I could sense a pivot in the third line. Being unsure of something is an opportunity for something unexpected to appear.
ladynyo said:
Yes,that is funny that that exists…and for a purpose.
Frank J. Tassone said:
Evening, Poets! Thanks, Frank, for a prompt right in my wheelhouse. The challenge is choosing from the abundance of brief poetry I have–especially this month. I’m participating in three haiku challenges for this year’s National Haiku Writing Month (NaHaiWriMo 2018)! LOL!!!
Frank Hubeny said:
Haiku are brief. Best wishes on the haiku writing this month, Frank.
Frank J. Tassone said:
Thanks, Frank!
jazzytower said:
Ooo! Brevity, I like😊. Hello everyone!!
Nice work Frank.
Pat
Frank Hubeny said:
Thanks, Pat!
rosemawrites said:
I wrote a haiku yesterday, a traditional one, but I scribbled a simple tanka! Thank you for this prompt, Frank. I am a fan of the power of a few words. 🙂
Frank Hubeny said:
There is power in a few words, even in silence. I liked your description of indecision in your poem.
rosemawrites said:
I cannot agree more! And thank you, Frank!
Vaccinius said:
I made a poem after reading yesterday’s prompt, also, and experienced that Satan would not let me post it on Google+. That is a bit sad. I may have opened people’s eyes for a fine creative artist, by her pictures. And I may have done a favour to the people of the U.S.A.
Well. That is how it goes when you let Satan rule. You cannot expect wonders. Today’s poem, Satan let me post, though, and I hope it is as simple and as resolute as the call for brevity asks for.
Frank Hubeny said:
I liked your poem. I don’t know how to post a response to Google+ but I liked how you associated creativity with being “solid” and with “solitude” and I liked the idea of arms stretching out for art. Thanks for linking it with this prompt, Anders!
Laura Bloomsbury said:
You are the master of brevity Frank but it was a struggle for me even with free verse – thank you though
Frank Hubeny said:
Sometimes one needs to use more words to say what is important clearly. Sometimes brevity is enough and provides emphasis because it is short. I liked your description of someone sleeping on the “bedroom bench”. There is more one could say on such a topic, but then there can always be another poem or story to expand the thought.
merrildsmith said:
Hi All–thanks for the prompt, Frank. I will try to post something more upbeat later. I would like to try some of these other forms, if I have the time.
Frank Hubeny said:
After reading yours it occurred to me that brevity is a form of emphasis whether it is upbeat or not.
merrildsmith said:
Yes, that is a good way of thinking about it, Frank.
barbara_y said:
Thanks for the prompt–an unconstraint.
https://fredherring.wordpress.com/2018/02/16/constrained-to-be-brief-i-flop/
Frank Hubeny said:
That time stretching half-way in your poem will likely stay in my mind so it probably didn’t “flop”, but maybe flopping has benefits I will understanding in due time.
Janice said:
Good morning Frank. I almost missed this prompt due to ‘life’ but fortunately saw it. Interesting information about William Porter.
Cheers!
Frank Hubeny said:
I’m glad you saw it, Janice, and I hope ‘life’ is fine. I liked “curtain of leaves” in your poem.
Janice said:
Thank you Frank … life is fine … but its rhythms don’t always match those of our virtual world.
Björn Rudberg (brudberg) said:
Now it’s Friday and soon time to move from brevity to brewity 🙂 Will get around to read later tonight.
Frank Hubeny said:
Brewity sounds good as well.
rivrvlogr said:
Well, I was brief, as in tanka, but with a footnote, of sorts.
Frank Hubeny said:
Being brief highlights a point. One can always expand on the point, as you have done, separately. Sometimes one has to do both.
Mish said:
Coming in very late, but grateful to join in. Brevity can be very powerful. Thanks for this interesting prompt, Frank.
Frank Hubeny said:
I’m glad you’re here, Mish! I could feel the power behind yours. Brevity focuses attention.