Note: This essay originally appeared almost exactly one year ago, as an invited article on One Stop Poetry, an institution, but alas no longer accessible. In celebration of the anniversary, I’m reissuing an updated version of the essay as the first of a series on FormForAll that I plan to do, on free verse. – Samuel Peralta
—–
When I began thinking about what I should say about vers libre, free verse, I scanned through my online poetry blog to find this piece, “Solstice”. I’d started this work years ago; only very recently did it finally find its way to this voice.
—–
by Samuel Peralta
1
The hand loses its hold upon the reins.
Across the veins of sky the sun courses,
sweating the glistening sweat of horses
mouthing the wind.
About the surging manes
the muscles arch, flinging the feeble strain
of arms around the rebel neck away.
Incarnadine the waters of the bay,
shrouding the ashen soul that tried to tame
this sun, to twist the whip across the skies.
2
Turn away the eyes that look up and drown
in the roar of the edging night. Slower
than a falling feather, the evening dies,
a shudder eclipsing the sun.
Lower
O Icarus, O Icarus come down
—–
At first glance, this looks like free verse, but it isn’t – it’s a sonnet masquerading as free verse. Read it again!
The end-line rhymes are the first giveaway; but I’ve used a number of devices to camouflage the form while staying truer-to-form than some other modern sonnets.
Some of these devices include two mid-line breaks to disguise the number of full lines (fourteen); an irregular, non-iambic rhythm to mask the line lengths (pentameter); differing numbers of lines per stanza to break up the double quatrain-tercet rhyme structure (ABBA-ACCA DEF-DFE), and using numbered sections to separate the Phaethon and Icarus episodes.
I love free verse; a majority of my work isn’t structured around formal verse forms like the sonnet, villanelle, sestina or pantoum. I hold with T.S. Eliot’s view that “no verse is truly free” for a writer who wants to do “a good job” – though “Solstice”, as a camouflaged sonnet, is admittedly an extreme example of this.
But here I’m approaching free verse as a workman’s craft, and not simply a mode of instantaneous emotional expression. And there are writers out there who can let loose stream of consciousness compositions that are stunning – to those who can do this, I bow; I’m just not capable enough to do this. I have to work at it.
Looking at it as a craft, however, I believe that you’re able to write the best free verse you can when you are most practiced at formal verse. Which is to say, while the best way to master sonnets is by writing sonnets – the best way to master free verse is to write sonnets.
It’s been said that Pablo Picasso, at 17 years of age, could paint as wonderfully as the old masters – and thus he freed himself to explore his own, unique, idiom. It’s the same idea.
For poetry this foundation of modernism on the classical – to run the risk of over-simplifying things – is about two things: collecting tools, and bending the rules.
On tools:
The fundamental basis on which poetry is formed – which helps differentiate it from prose – is the same for formal or free verse. It is a musicality of line, despite the absence of music.
The tools that help one achieve this are many: rhyme (end-line or internal), rhythm, onomatopoeia, alliteration, enjambment, word and phrase repetition, pacing, these are just some of them. Picasso’s evolution into cubism was effective because he had instilled himself with the devices of the movements that had gone before.
The trick of the craft, if there is one, is to be able to use these techniques intuitively. Use them too consciously, and your free verse composition sounds stilted. However, if you are so familiar with these tools that they arise – as if by magic! – as you write, then you might amaze even yourself. And the only way practical way (at least that I know) is to practice using all these tools in formal verse.
On rules:
You need to understand the rules in order to bend them. In the America’s Cup yachting competition, the rules specify quite clearly the kind of boats that can compete – defining overall length and hull displacement, for example.
But the history of the America’s Cup has been one in which the winner has, by understanding the rules, bent them to his benefit. Winged keels and fiberglass hulls are just two examples of winning innovations that sprung from a clear understanding of the rules.
The trick of the craft, again, is not just breaking the rules just for the sake of breaking them. It is understanding the rules, so you know how you can bend them to the best benefit of your poem.
What I struggled with in “Solstice”, for example, was that the theme of ambition, using a sun metaphor, had two strong archetypes I could use – Phaethon and Icarus – and I wanted to use them both, at the same time.
Exploring this in pure blank verse – which I did when I first started writing the poem – I had a difficult time uniting the two archetypes, they always seemed to belong to two different poems. However, by bending (or breaking) the sonnet form, I was able to use the structure to unite the disparate but similar myths.
In the end, it is all about using the best means to express your poetry… So the next time you sit down to write, and your poetry begins to take the shape of free verse, see what happens if you remember Picasso, and America’s Cup.
—–
The invitation is to write your own free verse poem that is not really free verse. It can be a sonnet, haiku, triolet, tanka, anything – but disguise it so that it doesn’t look like a structured poem.
Post your poem on the linky below, and please visit the sites of a few other poets as well. You never know what high art you might find. Perhaps even a Picasso.
brian miller said:
nice sam…hopefully i did not bend the rules too far with mine…haha..see i can get into this form because i can play…smiles…your own example in this really inspired me, so props to you….solid article man
at work so will not be around the trail for a bit, but will catch up when i get off…
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
I knew you might get into it, with a (not quite) free verse format! It’ll be fun for me to explore free verse in all the myriad ways that you can structure it. Just watch!
tashtoo said:
At the office too…but that means I get to sneak online and read and share! (By all means necessary, right?) Fantastic article Sam…going to have some fun with this…may not as much as Brian but… Thank you Poets! I’m off to write!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Thanks Tash! Just got back from work myself, so will have a bite to eat before I make the rounds. But help yourself to some peanuts! 🙂
Laurie Kolp said:
Oh, my but this is quite the challenge on the second to last day of school, but I’ll try! I love the article, though… it’s a keeper!
aprille said:
Sam, please forgive my doing it wrong first [ a few times probably].
This is the only way I can work through these posers.
Now I am going to read your wonderful essay again to see what I can change.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Aprille, all is forgiven 😉 …I shall stop by in a minute and have a look.
Laurie Kolp said:
I did it… can’t wait to hear what you think!!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
A keeper! Awww, shucks, thanks, Laurie!
Brian Carlin said:
This reminds me of guitar virtuoso Robert Fripp talking ages ago, and advising budding guitarists to spend the first half of their lives perfecting technique, and the second half forgetting about it!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Brian, that’s exactly the right sentiment – you perfect the technique so you have the ability to disregard it. I’m going to look up Robert Fripp!
charlesmashburn said:
I know I bent the rules! I don’t have a clue about forms and such, and just kind of write whatever rambles across my silly ol’ brain. I used to rhyme most of my poems, but kind of got into the habit of just telling a story and seeing how it comes out. Anyhow, I just threw my latest into the bar, and we’ll see if it goes off, or turns out to be a dud and just lays there under a stool. If yer gonna kick me out, just whisper and nod toward the door.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Bending the rules IS the rule, so strictly speaking, you didn’t bend the rules, you abided by them. Which means you didn’t abide by the rules to bend the rules, which means…
Oh bother!
charlesmashburn said:
That’s what I was thinking!
welshstream said:
Sam love your poem, some great imagery …. and what a fun prompt. Mine’s logged so settling down with a glass of malt ;o)
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Well, sir, you have earned that glass of malt! Me, I’m going to have a bit of a shepherd’s pie first, perhaps, before I dive into the poetry. Cheers!
all time oldes said:
This is a wonderful post. I so enjoyed it. Thank you. (swansongs)
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Thanks for stopping by – have a pint before you go!
all time oldes said:
Couldn’t possibly drink a pint, but thanks anyway – a small schooner for me 🙂
Glenn Buttkus said:
Sam, you cleaver devil; what a terrific challenge, to take some formal verse, some girdled lines, and snap the lacing, pop the straps, and let those girls swing free and fluid, sexy and titillating. I think I rose to the task, but only you can be the judge; regardless I had another bang on time kneading poetics into dVerse dough.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Glenn, the metaphor in your comment is as close to free sex as this column will ever get 😉
Glenn Buttkus said:
You might be a “cleaver” devil, or maybe just clever, but either way you challenges always thrust me into vers libre with abandon.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
My intent exactly, thank you!
ladynyo said:
sam, this is a MONSTER of a challenge…and I will fail miserably!
However, it took me a while to get my head around sonnets…simple (are there ever such a thing???) sonnets…however, it gave me a ‘voice’ that I would have never thought or recognized in me.
I love, love, love freeverse (which is never free…) but this piece “Immortal Marriage” started out to be freeverse, and then…for some damned reason, segued into sonnet form.
You are offering quite the challenge, and I can’t wait to see what pops up!
Lady Nyo
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Oh I’m pretty sure you’ll find a way to address the challenge. Remember, “Solstice” was like your poem, it started out as (true) free verse and then evolved into a sonnet. Can’t wait to have a peek at your poem!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Oh I am pretty sure what you’ve come up will be equal to the challenge! Remember, my own poem “Solstice” started out as a true (free verse) poem and then evolved into a sonnet, exactly like yours.
Gay said:
Oh Sam, I didn’t know what you were writing about this week, but it shows we’re on the same wave length. That is exactly the sort of thing I tried with my post Balancing which I just posted for OpenLInkNight here: http://beachanny.blogspot.com/2012/05/balancing.html I like it because it sounds like prose and yet it’s a sonnet; however, I’m not fond of didactic verse as a rule (although I have soft spot for Kipling’s “If”) and yet that is what evolved as I wrote it. Sometimes my ideas, as firm a hold as I think I have on them, decide to go their own way.
I shall try to find something new that also meets the challenge. Perhaps after you finish your set, we should re-run the other three written by Steven M. Grant, Hedgwitch, and Shay (Fireblossom) — with their consent, of course.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Always knew we were on the same wavelength, Gay, it’s nice to see more evidence of it!
I have one more twist-on-free-verse article, then have dibs on articles on pantoum, glosa, and square poems. 😉
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Gay, great to see that synchronicity still play a part! I’ve got one more free-verse-not article in me, and then dibs on the pantoum, glosa, and square poem! 😉
Gay said:
You got it! Love the added information you included today.
I might put one up now and again on my day. Each article deserves another outing. I was so impressed by them all. Again subject to the permission of the authors themselves. Thank you!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Oh wow! “Stein – Art – Picasso” is an absolutely fabulous poem, and possibly the most accomplished and exact response to my challenge of a free-verse-poem-that-isn’t… see the poem for my full commentary. Wow! 🙂
vivinfrance said:
Sam, you say what i’ve been saying for years, mostly to people who say “I can’t write formal poetry” and oh how right you are about the musicality it takes to make the free-est of free verse. It is strange the way the theme seems to dictate the form.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
For me, musicality is one of the most essential ingredients of poetry, which can elevate prose into something more.
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Exactly, I find that musicality of line is one of the most fundamental characteristics of poetry.
Victoria C. Slotto said:
Sam, this is a great post and I agree, as I see Viv does, that form poetry is the basis of good free verse…there has to be a sense of musicality to poetry no matter how it unfolds. I often find myself looking for a word that fits my thought that still has a certain stress and number of syllables. That’s another reason I believe it’s important to read our work aloud when editing. I hope to respond to your prompt but, more than likely, will post it in next week’s OLN since right now I’ve got a full plate. Thanks.
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
I can live with seeing it in OLN, Victoria, only thing is that Tueday nights – with 150+ people sharing their poems – can be so hectic! But I’m definitely glad you agree about form being the basis for good free verse.
seingraham said:
Hey Sam – nice to see you manning the room again tonight; a great topic and wonderful info as well, plus, of course your own superb work. I find whenever I try bending the formal rules I end up imitating usually – hence a rough villanelle a la Thomas’ “Do Not Go Gentle” … I agree it’s important to know the rules and even practise the form(s) periodically so appreciate the prod and the examples. I have to admit tho’, the Picasso example always reminds me that I think, knowing what I fine artist he was – I really think he was having the public on by the end of his life – kind of saying “I can paint just about anything and those fools will pay millions for it” – I know that’s not the popular view but it’s a thought. Of course, there are many formalist poets who might say the same about free verse poets … lol.
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Imitating the rhyme scheme and rhythm of an existing poem is a really effective way of jumpstarting a new work. I’ve done this more than a few times, and it does work!
Don’t know about Picasso’s approach to commercialism, but I do know that it was perfected by Andy Warhol and Damien Hirst.
hedgewitch said:
Sam, this is a fascinating prompt. Unfortunately, I’m in the midst of a disorienting transfer of all my poetry files to a new computer, and many other little aggravating technical issues regarding my internet. I will see what I can do with this one, but atm I’m stuck far away from poetryland in a grim wilderness of new software. :_C
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Ouch! Sorry to hear that! I try to back up everything regularly… but why does it always happen that a computer fails just when you haven’t backed up for a couple of weeks?
hedgewitch said:
I haven’t lost anything, fortunately–I just had to finally abandon my old pc for a new one(forced by my internet provider, basically) and it’s been a hassle. I have a poem up that has internal rhyme and structured stanzas, but i think you’d be hard put to call it any kind of form–maybe it’s what happens to free verse when you finally have assimilated some form concepts? Anyway, it’s here–if you think it qualifies, let me know and I’ll link it in.
http://versiscape-lifesentences.blogspot.com/2012/05/face-in-storm.html
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Does it fit as verse that’s not totally free? Close enough!
brian miller said:
i am back in and now able to hit the trail…be around soon…and thanks for those that read in my absence…smiles…
brian miller said:
and having caught back up…i am out again…end of month paperwork tonight and its a beast….will catch you all again later….
Gay said:
This is new for me – finally got it up – Stein Art Picasso. Thanks this was a huge challenge.
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Very cool, can’t wait to have a look!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Had some trouble with the Internet last night, so will have to catch up today…
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Hey Brian! Hard day, eh? Me too, we both need to hit the pub for real.
brian miller said:
haha would love to man….got to get through today….we have an audit coming on monday by the govt…once through that life will be back to peaches and cream…also have a job interview per se today as well…woot…
Heaven (@asweetlust) said:
I will drink to that ~ Good luck Brian ~
Lydia said:
Best of luck on the job interview, Brian.
Would you believe that I used to be an auditor?
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Good luck Brian!
rosemary mint said:
Samuel, I am in awe of your poem. The sound, the rhyme, the visual appeal. It is magnificent. My favorite lines are the opening two, and then all those that follow. Brilliant work. I am amazed.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Thanks so much, the final version was put together literally years after the first version!
rosemary mint said:
“Looking at it as a craft, however, I believe that you’re able to write the best free verse you can when you are most practiced at formal verse.” … This is certainly something to think about.
What a thorough and insightful prompt, Samuel. Thank you.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
There are definitely people who have an instinctive feel for musicality in free verse; but those people, I find, can also do formal verse – they just don’t choose to.
Heaven (@asweetlust) said:
Sam, an interesting post. I tried this process though the form is always at the back of my head. Well its been a long day at work and this was my outlet ~ Cheers ~
brian miller said:
hey we all need those outlets…sorry you had a long day…def was for me yesterday as well…
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Seems like we all had long days yesterday… Maybe a visit to a real world pub is in order!
ManicDdaily said:
Hi Sam – I love the idea of this–first because I write a lot of formal verse, and secondly, because I try, generally, to make it fairly colloquial. So, it is (sort of) up my alley. And although I do generally agree with you, I’m not sure about that painting part — I think it’s important that people can manipulate their tools, and I agree that Picasso was a great draftsman – but I also think people who do not like abstract art much sometimes feel comforted by the idea that an abstract painter – such as a Pollack or Johns, for example, is also a great draftsperson. I really like abstract painting of many kinds, so find this is not all that important to me.
EXCEPT, that people should try to get to know their medium and to be able to play with it.
I don’t count myself in a player category. I write forms just because there are less decisions to make.
At any rate, I liked the prompt and now I’m a bit incoherent, extremely tired. I did put something up, not sure it fits the bill exactly. I am going to try to do this exercise though again. Thanks much and best of luck with your book – glad doing well. Sorry I haven’t reviewed yet. My life is really very stressful right now. (I’m sure a lot of people are in the same boat and not whining about it! Sorry). I will get to it. K.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Karin, I’m sure we’d have an amazing conversation about art over coffee somewhere!
One point I forgot in the article above, and should say in future versions, if any – camouflaging your structured poem, sonnet, whatever, makes it appear more accessible to the average reader, who may actually be hard-wired to fear structured poetry. It’s thus a way to get more people to love structure.
vivinfrance said:
What an excellent point you make: Just don’t call your poem Villanelle or Sonnet!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
LOL, yes, just don’t!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Oh, and thank you for the kind words about the book. I promised myself not to mention it here, but since you brought it up – thank you.
Anna Montgomery said:
Sam, an excellent prompt. I wanted to stop by to let you know I’ve been having trouble with my spam filter and just found your wonderful comment. I so admire your work and appreciate your kind words.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
I wondered why my post wasn’t showing! I’d been having some Internet problems at the same time, so I ascribed it to that.
David King said:
Fascinating , this one. I have posted a response.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Great! Will have a look soon! …and thanks for stopping by!
K. McGee said:
Mine started out as free verse, then I tried my hand at turning it into a cinquain, but I simply lost the smooth rhythm of the read. Eventually I settled on a blank verse.
This has been a wonderful exercise; a great way to experiment with finding the right form for the poem. Thanks for another great prompt.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Great! Not exactly the process I went through to get my not-free-verse poem above, but it definitely is a good way to find your way to the essential form.
Lydia said:
Sam, Sam, Sam! What a beautiful prompt. I had such fun with it.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Lydia, Lydia, Lydia! I’m glad you found something fun in it! Thanks for stopping by!
aprille said:
Thank you, Sam, for making us play with this concept and for your patient and kind comments. And thank you for the Solstice poem which becomes more beautiful at every reading.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Thank you for playing with the concept, for me poetry is a way of life, and it’s fun to be able to talk about how I approach things, which is a little different from the norm, I think.
claudia said:
very cool prompt sam…i think it def. helps to have some form experience to get a feeling for rhythm and meter…listening to rap or jazz helps as well i think…also like what you say about picasso.. saw some of his early paintings in the Met and they were good but could’ve been painted by anyone…so it’s good to learn the basics and then free ourselves to discover our own unique voice…
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
In truth, if you write a lot of musically- based free verse (like you and others here do, actually) that can work as well as a formalism. Formalism, for me, is one of the first steps – as you say – to discover your unique voice.
punnypalaver said:
This prompt is one that deserved repetition–a great article with interesting insight. Your poem was amazing–a bit intimidating as an example to be followed–but hearing you talk about craft vs. free association reminds me that it takes work, work, work as a prof/poet I studied under in college, RT Smith, used to say. Very encouraging and challenging words. I tried the triolet and bent the rules with not using the exact rhyming words and breaking up the lines so the repetition and end rhyme were not obvious. This was fun and a “disguised form” is something I will definitely try again.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Thanks! I hope you will indeed come back to the article again. It was much fun to write, and gave me a chance to express some of my philosophies about writing poetry.
gardenlilie said:
Sam I’ve just arrived and given you my attempt at a sonnet. I so want to do a sonnet, so let me know if I’m close. Give me your analysis. Happy Friday to the pub.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Happy Friday! It’s the weekend, I’m so looking forward to settling down and reading 🙂
claudia said:
ok…so no nerves at the moment to write form…even though it’s about bending it…smiles..but will try to hit some of the entries
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Claudia… you, at a loss for poetry? I’m shocked! Well, looking forward to bumping into you on the trail, then!
Valerie Valdes (@valerievaldes) said:
Sometimes it’s strange how easy it is to fall into a certain cadence. Working with different line breaks certainly makes for a challenge, and gives an interesting new perspective on the composition of each line. Great prompt.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Valerie, you know I am in love with your poems, I always look forward to reading new ones.
brian miller said:
whassup poets….swinging in on a break and catching up…be back to catch those still coming once i get home…it is friday right? smiles…
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Finally! The work-week’s behind me, too, and I can get to reading more of the poetry!
James Rainsford said:
Have shared this once before, but I feel it fits the bill for this prompt. Hope my fellow poets agree. Here’s the link:http://bit.ly/KnjrgS
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Glad you stopped by, James, looking forward to the read!
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
Someone asked me, where’s my poem?… Though I’d already posted “Solstice” in the article.
Well, here’s a new one – “The First Joyful Mystery is the Annunciation”
Most people have found the tanka in the middle. But this poem is made up of not one, not two, but three nested structured poetic forms.
Yes, I am a masochist.
Semaphore / S. Peralta said:
The poem is a sonnet ‘pregnant’ with a tanka.
A dVerse FormForAll prize goes to whoever finds the third structure.
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Brian Miller for the touchdown!
My poem is an acrostic tanka in an acrostic sonnet.
Isn’t form-as-free-verse fun? 🙂
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Raivenne said:
The funny thing for me is that I break forms or combine forms often enough as is. The challenge for me was finding a new form writing for it and then free versing it in the less than 90 minutes left on the posting clock. I choose a villanet (a hybrid of the Villanelle and the Sonnet. The final stanza replaces the sonnet couplet with a typical
villanelle tercet).
Nothing like working under self imposed pressure – thanks!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
I myself work better under pressure, so I appreciate this!
Umesh Rao said:
This one was a wonderful prompt Sam!
I tried to camouflage a villanelle in the veil of a free verse ( as a matter of fact it is my first villanelle too ). Thanks for making our muses dance to these wonderful prompts. Happy weekend!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
Happy weekend to you too!
Semaphore / Samuel Peralta said:
What a pleasure it’s been to read everyone’s work, I even found a couple of poems that I wish I’d written… thanks everyone! See you all at Stu McPherson’s get-together later today!
Gay said:
Sun stand still – a cultural stop between two sun myths. I think there is that idea of modernism that lies in juxtaposition and enjambment. (BTW I admire how you got wordpress to accommodate your indentions – still doesn’t work for me) but those broken lines are very effective in stopping the look of rhyme; the word choices perfectly stopping any sense of regular sing/song rhythms. There is, nonetheless, music that those same words render – music and beauty. Kudos to you!
Susan said:
I never did write to your prompt, but today I posted a poem from a year or two ago that does answer to your prompt. Better late than never, better old than none. I will save your prompt in my “try another day” file!